LOTSA FROWNS....

This marks another chapter in  my pageless book-free life, but it seems eternity before i can even turn on one page. Must I admit when I say I was wagging behind instead of barking to the front.
I just realised I was too shallow for my tears and that it was a waste to waste my feelings on it. I wasnt never sure of it but now i think I have made my own point not to discard it.

P.S. Least the clown befalls me, I will never let the frown surpass my smile: even though I am a Stern girl....

HEAR Meh...

Months back, I stood carved like a figure in the sand, where wind blows not to lift the sand but to curve the outlines. I had shrined myself not to step out onto the cold world of furnancing heat and steamy anger.
Months from now, I had envisioned things to be enclosed within my encasement and that I will never prey on the world outside.
Months from that day, I am wandering like I am lost... i may have found a place to wander but i am still slueless about what is yet to come! Its like breathing the air not knowing from where I am breathing...

P.S. lend me a ear...

CRY ME A RIVER....

This day of the month, I cried for hours feeling under-imposed, under-estimated and vulnerable. I cant bear to let myself crying infront of anybody that i choose to hide myself behind the closed doors and cry as loud as i can.
I cried till I fell asleep and I could hardly breathe in! Can i not feel so reckless and under-mined?
i wanna go home and cry in somebody's arms... i really want to! Can i ever get that break to do this one thing  that I wish to!
P.S. Nuture me in my arms and I wont say a damn thing...
I am counting mintues to let the pain ease without counting the seconds that peirced my heart and left it hollow!

IDIOTIC SOUNDS!

It never crossed my mind that i would be struck by a blow, atleast not by that guy. It feels terrible and i wont complain because I admit I was at fault too. I mean, I am taken to be harsh-spoken but I never spoke after thinking. perhaps, I should have! A lesson taught!

the moment caught me by my tears and I almost shed a tear if not streamed it. I remember, I could hardly move my lips and all I did was  to look around and move away from that sight. i drapped my hair around my face and rushed in the direction of no-one. I skipped few faces along the way but I was confident that I aired my shallowness. lost feeling from the pride you held on so long was eating me inside and I rushed to the room to console myself with tears after I had soaked my eyes infront of the computer. i could hardly steal away a  look on my face that i had to bury it in the lap of the moniter. Feeling helpless, I rushed to my shabby room and cover myself up in the blanket which I had never folded neatly after my early wake up. I cried to myself but I didn't wanted to hear me cry. I sobbed and let the tear flow but I could hear myself crying from deep within and it echoed in my breath. I tried to ensure that nobody could hear me but I now i cam not that sure of my own effort. Everybody could look at me and say that I was beaten up to badly for a petty cause.
I have also begun to realise that I have become very rude and an angry girl. I do not want to be like this but i cant seem to help it either. Can I get a guardian angel to wave me a wand of sympathy and love?

P.S. I feel helpless but I help myself by confronting me with it!!!